We sat down to talk with Marie to get an insider perspective on what it’s like to visit with members as a volunteer. We’ve edited the interview for clarity and length.
Meet Marie
Do you remember your first visit with members? What was it like?
Oh, yeah. It was a little nerve-wracking going into the buildings – being in someone else’s space, knocking on someone’s door that you don’t really know. And then asking them to come talk to you or going into their home. I was pretty nervous, but my partner was really great. I had a great time talking with the members, so it put me at ease, and I felt pretty comfortable after several visits.
What has surprised you about visiting members?
I go into the apartments down here, and everyone is always really friendly and talks to you. You go somewhere else, like a fancy apartment complex, and no one ever says anything; everyone’s staring at their phones on the elevator. I find it nice to have more of that community contact. People saying, “Hi,” or asking, “How are you doing?” is really nice.
How did you first get involved with Maybelle Center?
I wanted to start volunteering for about four or five years, but it just seemed busy, and I could never find anything that I really felt connected to. I found Maybelle Center online and was inspired. I liked the mission of Maybelle because I worked with older people at a retirement home for a long time and I know the effects of isolation and how lonely people can get.
A lot of volunteers that they feel like they get as much out of the visit as members do. Do you feel similarly?
Yeah, I absolutely do. I feel like members have helped me grow and learn a lot about life. People usually have groups of peers or friends that are similar to them, and you don’t really sit down and talk to someone that’s so completely different in age, or gender, race, or experienced so many things. You learn a lot from just hearing people’s stories.
Sometimes it’s hard, though, and it makes me sad. But the members have all impacted my life – seeing the strength of people despite so much struggle. For example, one of our members has been trying to get a job and change his life for the last five years. Employers cannot get past his criminal record even though it was years ago.
It’s been really hard for him, and yet he just keeps going. He’s always positive and laughing. Even if I’m tired, I always leave the visits in a great mood, no matter what.
“Now when I start complaining about something that doesn’t really matter, I catch myself and say, ‘Wow, that’s really not that important in the long run.’ I mean, I have a safe place to live. I can afford to buy groceries…”
Marie
Maybelle Center Volunteer
Over half of Americans say that they feel lonely at one time or another. How have you seen loneliness or social isolation affect your friends or family?
I think it’s a huge problem, especially now with social media. Everyone is constantly online and posting things to Instagram. But are they really seeing anyone or doing anything? I’ve definitely struggled like that too. I moved away to a small town for a couple of years and didn’t know anyone. I felt totally isolated, and it was really hard.
We should try to reach out more, actually meet in person, and ask people how they’re really doing. Facebook or Instagram is just not the same as getting together for a drink or coffee or whatever. You can’t get the human connection through a screen.
What would you tell someone who is considering volunteering at Maybelle Center?
I would tell them that they should absolutely do it. It’s a life-changing, positive experience. I think a lot of people are afraid of committing. But it’s really just a couple hours a week, and once you get a routine going, it’s easy to do that.
I think some people avoid Chinatown, but it’s been really humbling and eye-opening being in this area of town. I think it’s important to understand the realities of other people’s lives and the hardships they experience. Because it’s vastly different from a lot of our lives. I’m grateful for those experiences.
